Five-Minute Academy - How to Remove a Stain

OK I’m only going to deal with stains on fabric here, generally removable fabric like clothes – ‘cause that’s where you drop most of your food, isn’t it? Apparently there are places you can get advice on how to remove stains from concrete. Though you’d have to be really clean to want to bother.

Fig 1: Identify your stain (see Fig 3) Be careful: see, fig 2.

Fig 2: Remember: if you haven't identified the stain correctly, or if you use an improper stain-removing agent or technique, you may make the stain permanent and cause additional damage to the stained object.

Fig 3: The Three types of stains

3a: Greasy Stains: bike oil, peanut butter, vanilla-scented body lotion. Treat by rubbing with washing-up liquid (if it’s chunky peanut butter, don’t forget to scrape the lumps off first) or by using an absorbent substance: cornstarch, that talc you got for Christmas, French chalk, fuller's earth.

3b: Non-greasy stains: These are real stains - pure pigment – fruit juice, ink, coffee, blood. Treat quickly with water. If that doesn’t work, try washing-up liquid, then ‘rubbing alcohol’ (whatever that is).

3c: Combination Stains: combine the worst elements of 3a and 3b: chocolate, thousand island dressing, cherry flavour lip balm. Use the instructions in Figs 3a & b alternately while panicking about Fig 2.

Fig 4: If you’re really desperate you could buy dry cleaning fluid but this stuff can be dangerous and ecologically unsound. If you’re the sort of person who spills ketchup all over yourself in the first place, ask yourself whether you should really be using this.

Fig 5: Remember, time is of the essence: the longer you leave a stain, the more difficult it will be to remove.

Fig 6a: If it is too late, try disguising the stain.

Fig 6b: Alternatively make a feature of it.

Comments

[Tree Surgeons in London]

The illustrations made me laugh, Great post thank you.

[DBC Reed]

You could stain the whole garment with the original staining agent ensuring a uniform effect.I appear to have done this with one side of a jacket creating a barely pliable surface. I would really like to know how to deal with glue as this is likely to be the origin of this problem.

[badaude]

I'm not sure glue quite counts as a 'stain' as doesn't alter the colour of the jacket, merely the texture. I suppose the only thing is to apply glue all over the jacket, which will make it look more uniform, though you may not be able to move your arms...

[Paul Tieman]

Absolutely one of your best drawings!

[badaude]

aw thanks!

[DBC Reed]

It has altered the colour of the jacket: this is how I noticed it.Then prodding revealed the change of texture.As one of the arms is badly affected, I will try glueing the other to see if this evens things up.I don't like the jacket that much.Fortunately.

[badaude]

Why not try applying something to the glue (on both arms)? How about a 'cuff' of greengrocer's plastic grass or doily or something? Let me know if it works.