Do you actually need a lesson in how to decorate your Christmas Tree? You would be surprised how many people fail to observe these essential rules.
Fig 1: First choose your tree. If buying after 20th December you will have to choose between fig 1a and 1c. (nb: if you still haven't bought one, check that date and worry).
Fig 2: Install in pot/holder. If this makes the tree too tall for your room, try one of these solutions.
Fig 3: Check lights. Put them on the tree first.
Fig 4: Unpack and untangle the treasured decorations you stored away so carefully last year.
Fig 5: Apply fake snow to tree until spray nozzle blocks (anything between 3-10 seconds). Immerse nozzle in water; prick with safety pin; repeat. Eventually attempt to make your own fake snow from shaving foam.
Fig 6: Admire your Tree. Anything missing? Attempt to fix star/angel/fairy/whatever to the top of the tree. You should have done this first. If you knock the whole thing flying, return to Fig 2.
I love this. I think there's a 1d too - the Christmas tree you get in the UK however early you buy - which is nice and bushy for the bottom two thirds, and has a spindly and sparse top.
Posted by: Chaumierelesiris | December 22, 2011 at 12:11 PM
Yes, why DO all the British trees have 'Charlie Brown' tops?
Posted by: Sam | December 22, 2011 at 11:52 PM
Like most things in the UK it may be something to do with the weather...
Posted by: badaude | December 26, 2011 at 10:06 AM
Ha. So funny. My grandfather and his brother actually cut the top off their tree one year. They were trying to help their parents out, so they cut down a tree and brought it home, and when it was too tall they cut off the top instead of the bottom.
Posted by: Amy | January 06, 2012 at 05:02 AM
Haha. The first solution I suggest - that of sawing a bit out of the middle - is drawn from real life: school caretaker...
Posted by: badaude | January 06, 2012 at 10:16 AM